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| Name: want2adopt2006 | Date: Mar 7th, 2007 9:43 PM |
| We are an energetic Northern CA couple looking to add to our family. We have been married 16 yrs and suffered with infertility throughout. In 2002 we were blessed by a special woman and adopted her precious baby girl. We would love to do the same again. Presently we have contact with our daughters birthmom through letters, emails, photos and a website and we can do this for you as well! We are Homestudy approved & we are waiting to adopt and you can view info about us at: http://www.lifetimeadoption.com/for _birtmothers/families/darin_pegg/index.htm l (you can copy and paste this link in your browser to go to our info) We would love to hear from you if you be interested in getting in touch with us. Our facilitator is at 1-800-923-6784 . You can ask for a full copy of our profile (Darin and Pegg) to be sent to you from them! Or contact us -Our email : want2beparents06@yahoo.com We hope to hear from you! ↑ |
| Name: Erin81 | Date: Mar 7th, 2007 10:06 PM |
| hey abbi, just wanted to let you now that me and my husband are trying to adopt we have are homestudy done and have an lawyer, just wanted to let you know no matter what family you pic i will be here to talk. you can email me at daviderincrawford@hotmail.com and we can chat more God Bless You and your choices Erin ↑ |
| Name: Dcallaham | Date: Mar 7th, 2007 10:11 PM |
| Hi Abbi, We are Kelly and Donna and we would love to talk to you. I really look forward to hearing from you so we can get to know each other. My email is: Dcallaham@yahoo.com I have instant messenger as well by that ID. Wishing you the best ! Donna ↑ |
| Name: tek | Date: Mar 7th, 2007 10:35 PM |
| Abbi- We are Mike and Traci. We are an adoptive family of a son. We are looking to adopt again and would love for you to look at our profile. Please feel free to email us at mike_tracik@yahoo.com. http://www.geocities.c om/mike_tracik/adoptionsite.html Sincerely, te k ↑ |
| Name: kcg.65hotmail | Date: Mar 7th, 2007 11:31 PM |
| We are a couple hoping to adopt! You can get info on us at: http://ourjourneytoadoption.blogspot.com/ ↑ |
| Name: Futuremom2be | Date: Mar 7th, 2007 11:40 PM |
| Hi Abbi, You are really going to need support to get through this. My suggestion is to go to a adoption agency and speak to a social worker. My husband and I are a home approved couple waiting to adopt. If you like you can see our profile on www.adoptionsfromtheheart.com and look under pregnant and then waiting families. You can read our profile (karen and craig ) and if you are interested in us you can talk to our social worker at the agency. There is a number on the website to contact them. Stay strong, Karen and Craig ↑ |
| Name: kimbertz | Date: Mar 8th, 2007 12:35 AM |
| Hello I have a beautiful little boy who is 3 that we adopted at birth. The birth mom already had alot of kids and knew that keeping him was not fair to her other kids or to the baby. She also knew that we wanted to be a mommy and daddy more than anything in this world. So she let us adopt him. She truly was our angel. I mean how do you thank someone for a life time of love, birthdays, christmas. Now we would love to give him a little brother or sister so he doesnt have to grow up alone. we would love to talk to you. thanks Kim =khoutz@woh.rr.com ? Also we could help you financially as we did before..... ? ↑ |
| Name: nyjocool | Date: Mar 8th, 2007 6:27 AM |
| Hi Abbi, we are a family of three from NY hoping to be a family of four soon through the miracle of adoption. We have a four year old girl who would love to be a big sister. If you are considering adoption for your baby, please visit our website to learn more about us-we'd love to talk to you! http://ouradoptionplan.com Good luck, Joanne ↑ |
| Name: mommyinwaiting | Date: Mar 8th, 2007 4:23 PM |
| Hi Abbi, I am so sorry you find yourself in this position. Honey, placing your baby for adoption with a loving family is a very big step, you should probably start with talking with a school counselor or a teacher you trust or your parents (if you are able to) to have them help you decide for sure what is best for you and your baby. My heart really goes out to you. We are looking for a birthmom to bless us, but in your circumstances, I would really recommend you speak with someone first. We have a wonderful baby boy who is almost 2 years old that we adopted, we also have an 11 year old daughter. I would hope if she ever finds herself in your shoes, she would come to me and together we could make a plan for her future. If you ever want to talk with me privately, please feel free to contact me at ladybug65@charter.net ↑ |
| Name: Dreamer | Date: Mar 8th, 2007 9:30 PM |
| Hi Abbi, I would love to talk with you about your adoption plan? When are you due? Do you have any kind of support or have you spoken with counselors? Please feel free to email me girl4jk@yahoo.com ↑ |
| Name: hannahsjp | Date: Mar 11th, 2007 9:31 PM |
| abbi is posting on the due date forum but forgets to mention she is in the UK. ↑ |
| Name: callie | Date: Mar 26th, 2007 3:39 PM |
| abbi - Myself and my family would love the opportunity to become parents again. We have 3 children of our own ages 15, 13 & 12. I am 34 and my husband of 16 years is 35. We own a very successful business and live in a beautiful community. Our kids are our #1 priority in life and all of us, including our kids, would love the chance to share a life with another child. Please e-mail me if you would like to chat more about giving your baby the opportunity at a wonderful life. bummylou@msn.com Sincerely, John, Colleen, Teal, J.D. & Brianna ↑ |
| Name: dmt | Date: Mar 26th, 2007 3:40 PM |
| Hi sweety I am so sorry for what you are going through. It sounds that you are a very smart and brave girl. My name is Michelle and my family is looking to adopt. I do have three children the youngest is 2. So your child would have siblings. I can have another child of my own but my heart tell me that I am suppose to give a loving home to a child that needs one. That is why I want to adopt. I would love your child as my own and would make sure that it has everthing it needs. Such as in addition to love the material things that it needs like clothing, play sports if it wants to, college etc. Oh yeh, my husband is a computer pogrammer and I was an ob sonagrapher untill we decided I was going to stay at home and be a full time mother . We live in a nice swim and tennis comminty with a playground and our house is located on a 1 acre lot. So there is plenty of room to play. Also we are caucasion. How far along are you. Do you know if it is a boy or a girl? Where do you live? Do your parents know that you are pregnant. Are your parents okay with adoption? How are you feeling? Have you had an ultrasound yet. If you have any questions about pregnancy I would be more than happy to talk to you about them. If you are interested or just meed someone to talk to email me at michelle.miller@pobox.com I wish you all the best of luck and love ↑ |
| Name: dmt | Date: Apr 4th, 2007 6:01 PM |
| Hi Abbi, please give me an email. i would love to talk. michelle.miller@PObox.com ↑ |
| Name: geminis73 | Date: May 11th, 2007 7:14 PM |
| Hello, I know you have alot of responses - if your still thinking- please email me at desiretobemom@yahoo.com ( we have been trying for 12yrs) - email me please. ↑ |
| Name: DAD | Date: May 11th, 2007 10:18 PM |
| if you feel that you can not cope and do not have any support from family / friends or the church. Then please email me. davidglenn1977@hotmail.com ↑ |
| Name: hannahsjp | Date: May 11th, 2007 10:30 PM |
| Geminis73 you might want to consider changing your email address as JANET POSEY used the name DESIRETOBEAMOM . ↑ |
| Name: waitingonbaby | Date: May 13th, 2007 11:57 AM |
| contact me. my email addy is crackerjack2007@yahoo.com. your the same age as my sister and she went through the same thing. ↑ |
| Name: Martu | Date: May 13th, 2007 1:02 PM |
| Abbi, Please do NOT give your baby to anyone. Let us help you keep your baby come to adoptioncrossroads nightly chat and we will find resources for you. The horrors of war pale beside the loss of a mother or baby. Anna Freud said this and it's true. Come for help. Don't let anyone talk you out of YOUR baby ↑ |
| Name: Martu | Date: May 13th, 2007 1:03 PM |
| Abbi, email us. Helpmekeepmybaby@adoptionhealing.com abd we will Martu ↑ |
| Name: mk | Date: May 13th, 2007 1:58 PM |
| Dear Abbi, You are young but you are not too young to have your baby and raise her or him. ALL mothers need support. With support YOU can do this. Do not think for a moment that because you are young your baby does not need YOU. You are the centre of your baby's world, There are many people here who will try to persuade you to give your baby to them to raise. They will tell you that this is the unselfish choice and "best" for you and your baby...They are NOT telling you this because they wish to help you and your baby. They are lookng to help themselves TO your baby. Abbi, in most other countries, it is not even legal for prospective adoptive parents to have contact with moms to be because it is recognized that this kind of contact is coercive; this kind of contact before your baby is born and before you have spent time with your baby after he or she is born is manipulative and dangerous. You cannot know now how strong your bond with your baby will be. That will become obvious to you after birth but if by then you feel you have "promised" your baby to couple, it could then be too late. Martu has invited you to come to adoptioncrossroads.org to talk with mothers of adoption loss and adoptees about their experiences. This is good advice. There is help for to KEEP your baby and for you to stay together and grow strong together. YOU CAN DO IT. I would suggest too that perhaps you talk to people on the single parents forum. Don't sell yourself short. YOU are your baby's mother, and your baby needs YOU; no substitute will ever be better than YOU. Here is a link to support website for teen moms and teen moms-to-be: http://teenmoms.ourfamily.com/ Abbi, please talk to young women in your situation BEFORE you make any decision. I wish you and your baby and your whole family love and joy, support and faith that TOGETHER you will grow strong, happy, joyous and free. Most sincerely, -mk (reunited adoptee and mother-to-be) ↑ |
| Name: Lyzard77 | Date: May 13th, 2007 4:53 PM |
| Hello Abby, I am a mother who found myself in a similar situation. I was pregnant, scared to death and felt that i would have trouble coping. So i did what you are thinking of and surrendered my daughter for adoption.. But what i wasn't told was how it is the worst experience you or your child will ever go through. These adoption specialists and adoptive families will not tell you the truth of what you and your child will go through as a result of this traumatic separation Your baby needs and wants YOU. She knows YOUR voice, Your Scent, YOUR walk, She knows YOU. She won't care that you are young, YOu are her mother and nobody can ever take that away from you. All she knows is YOU. You see i gave my daughter yup and then went back to fight for her in the courts. I was lucky, I won. I have my daughter. I no longer live with a deep aching grief/emptiness/ loss. And deep, deep pain.This decision will affect you and your child for the rest of your lives! Don't rush into an adoption decision. You do not have to make up your mind right after the birth. Bring your daughter home for a few weeks before even thinking you have to do it right after giving birth. Give your mind and hormones time to calm down. Don't make a decision based on fear. You are very vulnerable right now and everyone who wants to "raise" or help you make a "loving" decision is only taking advantage of you right now. You will feel different after giving birth. Everything changed for me in that moment. You do not have to make a decision then. Inform yourself. Don't not trust adoption counselours, attorneys or agencies. They will not support you if you change your mind. Find out the laws in your state. You have the right to place your child in foster care before you make a decision. You have the right to take her home. In some states after you sign those adoption papers you can never change your mind. Please, do not let this happen to you. You will find help. Look for groups in your area for single parents. Look in your phonebook for single parent groups, call churches, do what you have to do. There are also government resources such as WIC which can help you out alot. But please Abby do not ever feel as if you are obligated to anyone to give the m your baby. No matter what they do for you. Or how much you like them. You owe them nothing. She is you baby and always will be. You will never forget her. And you will always feel a loss. You are young, but i believe you can do it. It will be more difficult. I myself am a single mom. I do not have much right now. But i do not and will never regret fighting for my daughter. Please go to ADoption crossroads and chat with people there. I found alot of help and support. If you want to talk or ask me anything email me at Lyzard06@gmail.com ↑ |
| Name: sincerelyourstruely | Date: May 13th, 2007 5:29 PM |
| abbi_1993, Please listen to what we are saying to you. I know your post was met with a lot of people "wanting" your baby. I was that young mother too. I had my baby at 14 years old. I had some help from my mother. I was able to continue on in high school and graduated with my class. This was before they had ANY support for young moms. Now it is different high schools have mother and me classes where you can bring your baby. You are young but you can do it with a little help. I can say that as I have walked in your shoes. It is NOT impossible. Go to the sites that have been provided. Come to adoptese and hear the adoptee's and mother's telling the truth and pain of losing their connection. I am proud to say my daughter is a college graduate and she has two beautiful children, thankfully, I had support and help like any new mother would need regardless of her age. You will not be forever pregnant as it only takes 9 months to give birth. But if you choose adoption you will forever be without you heart your baby. hugs yts ↑ |
| Name: Waiting2BMom | Date: May 13th, 2007 11:27 PM |
| Please contact me at emmurrietta@hotmail.com. remember if this is what you are choosing to do... It is going t take a LOT of streangth but you are making a wise choice. Good Luck! Emily ↑ |
| Name: Waiting2BMom | Date: May 13th, 2007 11:29 PM |
| Oh by the way....There are people ( like my husband and me) who want to do what is called open adoption. Still gives you the oportunity to see the baby and watch him or her grow. ↑ |
| Name: mk | Date: May 13th, 2007 11:43 PM |
| Dear Abbi, Please, do not get into direct contact with anyone wanting to adopt your baby at this time. You and your baby are VERY vulnerable right now, and now is not the time to make any adoption decison. As I mentioned in my earlier post to you, in many countries this kind of soliciting and contact between vulnerable mothers-to-be and prospective adoptive parents is ILLEGAL because it is recognized as coercive. Come to www.adoptioncrossroads.org Moms of adoption loss and adoptees chat there every night at 11pm e-mail Joe Soll, he will help you to find support to KEEP your baby YOU CAN DO THIS; you will find support. I'm headed for chat now I hope I see you there -mk ↑ |
| Name: sweetmary | Date: May 14th, 2007 12:00 AM |
| mk a lot of the supposed pregnant teens are actually scammers. Not a lot of what goes on here from either side is real. ↑ |
| Name: Topaz1981 | Date: May 14th, 2007 3:48 AM |
| Dear Abbi, Please, please,please think carefully about adoption and your options before deciding this is right for you. Of course you're going to feel frightened and that you're not going to be able to cope but don't just choose adoption because you think your baby will be better of. Check out what support you will actually get before you go ahead with this and what practical help you can get. Also get to know other mothers who have relinquished before you do anything as they will be able to tell you how it really is emotionally and it isn't easy. I've been there and know that whilst you do get on with your life you also have to live with not having your child with you. Nothing can describe the pain of that and it is something you have to live with for the rest of your life. If, at the end of the day, you still decide that adoption is best after looking at ALL your options then fine just make sure you have that peace of mind that you explore all options. ↑ |
| Name: mk | Date: May 14th, 2007 4:04 AM |
| Dear Abbi, Another thing you should know before you make any decison to surrender your baby for adoption: in most states "open" adoptions are NOT enforceable by the natural mother of the child. This means that once the adoption is finalized if the adoptive parents do not wish to maintain contact with the natural mother "as agreed" they do not have to, and the natural mother can do little or nothing about it. Even in states where open adoption is technically enforceable, the legal reality is, once parental rights have been signed over it's the adoptive parents who have all the say. This is not something most agencies and prospective adoptive parents don't want vulnerable mothers-to-be to realize. They will tie up the prospect of adoption with ribbons and bows and promise you contact and involvement, but it hardly ever works out that way. And the decision to end or limit contact lies entirely with the adoptive parents. -mk ↑ |
| Name: HeatherUK | Date: May 14th, 2007 6:54 AM |
| I can't believe all these people trying to get your baby! Please get some independent unbiased counselling (ie NOT from an adoption agency - they only counsel in the direction of adoption) to find out what YOU need and what is best for YOU. So many people out there will try to steer you in the direction of what is best for THEM. Remember promises of open adoption are not legally binding and are used as a means to get your baby from you. http://www.keepyourbaby.com/ ↑ |
| Name: Laurel | Date: May 14th, 2007 7:10 AM |
| abbi: As you can see, adoption is a highly emotional issue, and many people are eager to make your decision for you. I don't presume to tell you what to do, but I hope you and a trusted relative or counselor (someone with no interest in your decision) can offer you help and support. Please do all the research and soul-searching you can do before you make a decision that is harder to reverse than many people will have you believe. Best wishes. ↑ |
